A broken heart…
We all want some love. I thought I could get away with not having to deal with that since my divorce so many years ago. Foolish me allowed myself to get caught up in what I thought could have been something more. Well the truth came to be that it was not to be.
As in all relationships, both sides have to have similar destination for it to come to both being satisfied with the end results. Here I thought I had given myself enough space that it would not affect me. Well that was not quite true. I rediscovered I cannot just do things for another without it affecting my emotions. A lot too late to then see that I wanted more than the other guy wanted.
Perhaps it could have gone on in the illusion of something more but silly me wanted to know and pressed on. There were signs but I chose to ignore them.
I fell harder than I would have believed and now I feel small and stupid about it all. They do say it is better to have loved and lost than not at all but I wonder why we seem to go through it so much when all we want is someone to love and have it returned. How difficult is that but apparently it is.
It can bring out the good or the bad in all of us, depending on the results of things, I suppose.
I guess I had been thinking that all the signs were pointing a certain way that it was a matter of course which was leading me to a sound conclusion.
In hindsight perhaps I should have seen the lack of interest and thoughtfulness if someone was really interested. There was not the usual overtures that you would get but thought it was due to age and how much we had already experienced in our lives. Then there wasn’t the calls that you would have expected either but here you figure we all have our preferences with texting, especially if they seem to have such busy lives. Then there is that, how busy is one if one is interested to make time for someone.
The conclusion is what we choose not to see since we want something, we tend to make many excuses why it isn’t how you wish it to be. the lesson is perhaps not to accept what we should deserve.
It is sad but we may choose to accept so much less for what we might perceive as love.
Take care to all and love, just love.